It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas (Despite Appearances)

Things have changed a bit since I last wrote here. I lost my job at Pho (the manager said it was because I was 5 minutes late, but I suspect it was because of a certain inconvenient friendship), Janice is back in Brazil (till Jan. 12), Oscar & Chloe will be back in Paris soon (permanently!), while Claudio & Giulia will be back in Italy for Christmas, and against all odds, it's actually "beginning to look a lot like Christmas."

Along with the general malaise that comes with feeling a bit under the weather, I've been noticing the differences between London and home a lot more than usual and it's made me feel a bit homesick. The details get to me. Things like familiar foods, TV specials, Christmas lights, and music. They reinforce the distance. I got a box mailed to me from home early this week, and it made me happier than I've been for a long while. (Not that I've been depressed or anything. It beat out a lot of good moments!) Along with a good dose of love, it contained primarily goodies from good ol' Trader Joe's: trail mixes, chocolates, vitamins, crunchy snacks, and the best lip balm in the world (the "music to your lips" one). I may still have had my feet planted firmly on British soil, but for that one moment I felt more at home than ever. By just looking at the lables, it was as though I was standing in the kitchen in Reseda, perusing the pantry for a snack. And the tastes were more heavenly than any treat at Marks & Spencer.

Before that box arrived, I'd found my one bit of home at Whole Foods. It's ridiculously expensive compared to any other grocery store (even it's US counterpart), but for the small bits of comfort it was worth it. It's the only place in London I've yet to find eggnog (though it doesn't taste much like the kind I drink at home... it's much too much like nutmeg-flavored whipping cream, and not at all thick). Bisquick doesn't seem to exist in the UK, so I got some pricey buttermilk pancake mix. Other goodies included Reed's ginger beer (I've tasted the British equivalent and came away pretty dissatisfied... it's waaay too sweet), pumpkin pie (just one lousy slice!) Dr. Bronner's Magic Soap (£4 for one bar!), and aloe vera body lotion (not nearly as nice as TJ's Midsummer Night's Cream).

Tonight, I've become a lot more optimistic about spending Christmas here. It's amazing what a little atmosphere can do. I lit a few candles, dimmed the lights, switched on the little gold Christmas tree I bought at Woolsworth's (I didn't know those still existed anywhere till coming here, but it won't be around for much longer), and played some holiday music on iTunes. I also made some chai lattes from scratch for both Agneta and I, and munched some almond bark (Trader Joe's!) and chocolate-covered Turkish Delight (Marks & Spencer). Agneta and I made a big paper star together and chatted about Christmas memories and other things. Ryan came in occasionally, and we watched some silly videos on YouTube, too. Something "clicked" and made this place feel a lot more homey; Christmas was in the air (please forgive my cheesiness). A couple weeks ago, I was hoping that either 1) by some Christmas miracle Kim would be able to visit for the holidays or 2) I could rent a cottage in the English countryside with a few other people, preferably where there's snow. The first option seemed possible for a while, but was eventually vetoed by my mom. The second left the picture when Agneta became aware of her dwindling finances and Janice left. Now, I just need to buy some garlands to hang over everything, and maybe get a little tree. Maybe we'll go see a traditional pantomime. Nothing is for certain, but at least the three of us remaining in this flat are optimistic.